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Friday 20 October 2017

You Won’t Believe These 10 Names Belong To Real Churches

These church names are so ridiculous that the fact that they are actually real is just unbelievable.

Who comes up with these names?  (kokofeed)

The church is definitely a sacred place of worship. So, it makes sense that the name would reflect this right?

Well, not all churches have figured this out yet, hence this hilarious strange names.

Here are 10 strange and funny names of real churches.

1. Barking Methodist Church in East London: Who wants to attend a church that barks?

tandbcontractors
tandbcontractors  (Barking Methodist Church)

2. The Five Precious Wounds Catholic Church, Stonebridge: This is still from London. All we can say is ‘why?’

Roman Catholic Church of The Five Precious Wounds, Stonebridge.
Roman Catholic Church of The Five Precious Wounds, Stonebridge.  (parish.rcdow)

3. Custom House Baptist Church: We hear this and what comes to mind are Customs officers. We can’t help but wonder it is a church for just custom officers. This is the only explanation for why a church would be called a ‘Custom House.’ This is also from London.

Custom House Baptist Church
Custom House Baptist Church  (googleusercontent)

Let’s bring it home. These remaining seven names are from our very own motherland, Nigeria.

4. Laboratory Church of God: What? Why?

5. Run For Your Life Ministry: Is the church for only runners?

6. Elshaddai Shall Not Die Ministries: We already know this to be true. So, why does it have to be the name of a church?

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

7. NTA Channel Jesus new Testament Assembly Worldwide: First of all, this is just too long. Secondly, why do Nigerian churches, schools, e.t.c always say worldwide when there is only one branch?

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

8. One Flesh Ministry International: Another international church that has not left the shores of Nigeria.

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

9. Occupy Till I Come Deliverance Ministry: Who is I? Jesus????

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

10. Mountain of Swallowing Problems Interdenomination Prayer Ministry: Where do we even start from?Swallowing ministry? Okay o. Also, shouldn’t it say interdenominational?

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

As we all know, Naija no dey carry last. Unfortunately, this also applies to church names. Here are additional names that we simply couldn’t ignore.

Guided Missiles Church

Jehova Sharp Sharp (Festac)

Satan in Trouble Ministry

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

Fire for Fire Ministry

Guided Missiles Church

FIST OF FURY (NTA road, Port Harcourt)

Hilarious Naija church names
Hilarious Naija church names  (kokofeed)

The Yoke Must Broke Ministry

Jesus Heal Ministry

According to the Newfrontiers,  “The name that you choose does make a difference.”

“For many people, it is the very first impression they will get of your church, and the way they perceive you (and even whether or not they decide to rock up and visit you) will be decided in part by the impression this name makes on them.”

Churches really need to take this listen when it comes to choosing their names.

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