Yes, yes, yes. I’ve heard it a million times over and said so myself over ten billion times, there are no responsible peeps. We get so fixated on our ideologies and think the problem is people. With age, I’ve come to realize I play a part in any problem I find myself, however innocent I am. Now, let me drive the issue closer so it won’t appear like I’m writing in Chinese…I want to marry, i want to date, no responsible partner… But we forget:
1. Terrible Life Routine
Most times we’re stuck on our routine, we want to be the first to get to work, we are rushing home like the microwave would explode if we don’t get to our homes in ten minutes, everything is chaotic, rush, rush and rush. We want to board bus, we fight, we queue to buy fuel we fight…Calm down the nerves, it’s highly probable your future partner’s walking along your path…I mean they say if life gives you lime, make lemonades, hence my hypothesis, that your future partner is always along your path in life. Take it or leave it..so calm down, ladies act like ladies…Guys relax…
2. Some routines keep people in self-induced bondage. This is it, We only see when you’re going or returning from church, after this we don’t see your face. You close from work and what happens, you’re inside locked up like you’re paid to be hidden. Who would see your face? No wait, we’ll ship you a partner from Olx…my bad… Konga.. Make time to be available, relax, love and enjoy life and take each day as a process and that special person is around the corner. Stressing yourself would only make you age quicker. WHY ? It takes over 100,000muscles to frown, but just a few to smile. Perhaps less than 50…and when you frown daily, that your Wo-wo face before becomes more wo-wo..
3. Be Open
Learn to get rid of the stereotypes, that broke guy will have cash tomorrow or may, to be modest, that assumingly wo-wo babe may get some make over tomorrow and she’ll be like “ntoin”, look at what you’re missing. Everyone has an inner layer, and it’s best to interact with the inner person before you shut people out. Getting a partner may depend on how badly you want it, and if you keep locking up, having stiffened mindset and prejudices about people, then wait, wait for the next 100 years, maybe an Holy Holy partner would come.
4. Be Available.
Everywhere is now a platform, put on a good appearance, adorn yourself with splendid character and you would magnet ( attract is too soft) a troop of “potentials” you can select from, every where’s a platform, social media, the bus, your work place, social venues. In fact, everywhere your feet step on, take dominance without being too loud, and watch yourself take the center of attraction. It’s not easy but the reward is huge.
5. Character
If you think life is a copy-cat of Nollywood, and you can shut down every guy like you’re his boss, don’t worry you’re probably 19, when you hit 41, you would have learnt some crucial life lessons. Be modest, don’t take up your sword for almost everything. Yes, poverty has badly conditioned the mindsets of many people so everything is a WAR, and they have their sword strapped prepared in their sheaths… Un-shealth your swords, throw away the sheaths, get off your high horse, everyone makes mistake, as the old ones they’ll tell you…Every partner has a few annoying habits, and the earlier you begin to look away from somethings, the closer you re to your objective….
I felt the need to type these few points quickly due to the pressing demands of society that has seen a battle between both sexes, bottom-line guys and ladies, be flexible, be open, be optimistic, if there are single ladies and guys, then we need more healthy relationships, not the ones to be endured but the one that can be used as a role model.. I’m clumsy and un-intelligent about relationship but I hope I’ve been able to pass one or two messages across.
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